On Vacation

NewsBlues is on vacation through mid-August. Jonah is busy running into cardboard cutouts of Anderson Cooper. To find out if he actually meets Anderson Cooper check out the travel blog! Don't know the URL? Email me.

Republican Redux

So I know it is a bit late for a post on the GOP debate in South Carolina. By now, probably everybody has seen this little testy exchange between Rudy Giuliani and Libertarian Ron Paul. (As an aside, the audience was asked to not applaud until after the debate, but somehow found time to applaud several times including after Rudy's response.)

Guess what the news networks were talking about the next day. Most expressed the expected outrage against Paul's analysis that 9/11/01 was blowback from US operations in the mideast. Of course, leave it to FoxNews's John Gibson to go off the deep end on a guy who has gone off the deep end.


Um, Mr. Gibson. Ron Paul was not making the same argument as the "9/11 Truth" types. They say that September 11th was a conspiracy by the government in order to lead a war for profit. Ron Paul does not. He believes this is the result of US interventionist foreign policies.

Look, my problem is not that Ron Paul is not being taken seriously. He certainly has a point, even if that point is wrapped up in a world view which depends on the incomprehensible "irrationality of US politics." But no, I do not expect US news to be sophisticated enough to discuss the ideological and empirical underpinnings of his argument.

But is it too much to expect the news to get the facts right? I mean, you are the news. He is not in line with the 9/11 Truth types. In fact, he is directly contradicting them. Can we please, please, please try to get our facts right?! YOU ARE THE NEWS, DAMNIT!

Speaking of "damnit," the absolute best moment of the debate was this one. The following question dominated the debate, taking up by far more time than any other question asked:

MR. HUME: Welcome back to the Koger Center for the Arts on the campus of the University of South Carolina.

The questions in this round will be premised on a fictional, but we think plausible scenario involving terrorism and the response to it. Here is the premise: Three shopping centers near major U.S. cities have been hit by suicide bombers. Hundreds are dead, thousands injured. A fourth attack has been averted when the attackers were captured off the Florida coast and taken to Guantanamo Bay, where they are being questioned. U.S. intelligence believes that another larger attack is planned and could come at any time.

First question to you, Senator McCain. How aggressively would you interrogate those being held at Guantanamo Bay for information about where the next attack might be?

Yes, the most discussed question of the night dealt with a hypothetical terrorist attack on the nation. This is what we have come to. Every other candidate had responded quite seriously to this absurd hypothetical. Fortunately, Tom Tancredo knew exactly what to do:

REP. TANCREDO: Well, let me just say that it's almost unbelievable to listen to this in a way. We're talking about -- we're talking about it in such a theoretical fashion. You say that -- that nuclear devices have gone off in the United States, more are planned, and we're wondering about whether waterboarding would be a -- a bad thing to do? I'm looking for "Jack Bauer" at that time, let me tell you. (Laughter, applause.)

Tom Tancredo: you the man. Call in Jack. This man is ready to lead in a way that Bush and Logan never were! Way to call the absurdity of the moderators. Unfortunately, he then kept on talking:

And -- and there is -- there is nothing -- if you are talking about -- I mean, we are the last best hope of Western civilization. And so all of the theories that go behind our activities subsequent to these nuclear attacks going off in the United States, they go out the window because when -- when we go under, Western civilization goes under. So you better take that into account, and you better do every single thing you can as president of the United States to make sure, number one, it doesn't happen -- that's right -- but number two, you better respond in a way that makes them fearful of you because otherwise you guarantee something like this will happen.

Stupidity leads to arrogance. Arrogance leads to foolishness. Foolishness leads to suffering.

OK so Tom Tancredo is a bit of an arrogant fool. But at the end of the day, he was the only one to call Hume on the absurdity of his question, and he invoked Jack Bauer in doing so. Therefore, until further notice, Tom Tancredo has the official endorsement of this blog.

CNN vs. BBC

<--I do not envy this man

So yesterday, President Bush named Lt. Gen. Lute to be the US's new war czar, apparently because our drug czar had been doing so damned well that we needed to keep going with this whole czar thing.

What, exactly, is a war czar, you no doubt ask. CNN explains:

In the newly created position, Lute would serve as an assistant to the president and deputy national security adviser, and would also maintain his military status and rank as a three-star general.

Still not clear on it? Well, the BBC got you back:

Correspondents say it is unclear exactly what General Lute will do, and whether the job will involve settling turf wars between the Pentagon and the state department.

He will serve as an adviser to the president but will also keep his military position and three-star ranking, reports said.

The Associated Press news agency reported that the new appointee would speak for the president concerning developments in the conflict areas and smooth over differences between rival departments.

So we actually have no clue what a war czar is, but we do know that he will surely speak to the President. Do we really need to hire new people, just to speak to the President? But how did they choose this guy anyway? CNN, I'll give you first shot again:

It was a difficult job to fill, given the unpopularity of the war, now in its fifth year, and uncertainty about the clout the war coordinator would have. The search was complicated by demands from Congress to bring U.S. troops home from Iraq and scant public support for the war. The White House tried for weeks to fill the position and approached numerous candidates before settling on Lute.

A difficult position to fill, eh? BBC, can you give us some more tantalizing detail?

Gen Lute was appointed after a lengthy search in which several candidates apparently turned down the position. He must be confirmed by the US Senate.

So let me get this straight: the government made a new position, forgot to figure out what that position actually does, and then found the only guy who wanted it to fill it. Victory is right around the corner.

(PS. Anyone else catch the Republican Debate last night: I hope to have a blog post about how Tom Tancredo gets my official endorsement for President up late tonight or tomorrow)

Do terrorists have standardized tests?

<--When you say this guy's name, make sure to pronounce the doubel "l" as an l-sound, and not as a y-sound. That way he will sound less Latino.

So today, the trial of Jose Padilla, "The American Taliban", began in Florida. Padilla, for those readers with short memories, allegedly plotted to set off a 'dirty bomb' in the US, and has been held for three years without charge as a result. So finally, they are bringing down the books on him, right?

Not exactly. He is being charged with supplying material aid to terrorits. The BBC explains:

The BBC's Andy Gallacher in Florida says some critics are calling the case "Padilla Lite" because the most serious accusations have been dropped.

But lest you think this is some minor affair, the US gov'ment wants you to know that it has the goods on this guy:

However, prosecutors say that an application form to attend an al-Qaeda training camp in Afghanistan will prove that Mr Padilla, also known as Abdullah Mujahir, was connected to Islamic extremists.

Hold up. Terrorists need to apply to go to terrorism camp? What happens? Do they write an essay on why that terrorism camp is the best one for them and submit a resume with their extracurricular activities? In my spare time, I enjoy playing basketball, leading the chess team, and, oh yeah, killing people.

I am assuming that if you don't get in to terrorism camp in Afghanistan, you are forced to go to the loser terrorist training camp in Somalia? Then again, I guess you could always just join the CIA...

<--This man disagrees with this entire post. I got nothing.

You know it's a pretty sad day when the top US commander in Iraq feels the need to remind his troops that it is probably a bad idea to torture people. The BBC is reporting that General David Patreus:

warned his troops not to sanction torture or abuse of Iraqi detainees and has urged them to fight by the rules.

Um, shouldn't that be the first thing that troops learn. "Welcome to boot camp. Follow your commanding officer's orders and don't break any laws. Now drop and give me 20!" Right? Apparently not:

It comes a week after an army mental health advisory team released a survey of troops in Iraq, which found a wide tolerance for torture and abuse.

More than a third believed that torture was acceptable if it helped save the life of a fellow soldier or if it helped get information about the insurgents.

About 10% of those surveyed said they had actually mistreated Iraqi civilians by hitting or kicking them, or had damaged their property when it was not necessary to do so.

Ten percent of troops admit to mistreating Iraqis. There are currently 152,000 US troops in Iraq, so that means that 15,200 US soldiers admit to mistreating Iraqi civilians, plus however many mre have rotated out. 'Nuff said.

Why I cannot stand sociologists

OK, so in truth I think very highly of a large number of sociologists: Jeff Paige, Emile Durkheim, Jorge Durand, etc. It is just a particular type of sociologist I cannot stand. Namely, the survey-wielding quantitative type.

Today, the New York Times is reporting on the Pope's trip to Brazil, the most populous Catholic country in the world. In the past two decades, however, Brazil has gone from being about 90% Catholic to only about two-thirds Catholic, with Pentecostal movements taking up a large part of the slack. If only I had some compact way of understanding this. Something that requires only about 100 words. Yo Sociology! Little help:

“Brazil has become a country with a lot of religious mobility, a mosaic,” said Silvia Fernandes, a sociologist at the Federal University of Rio de Janeiro who worked on the survey, which had been conducted at the request of the National Conference of Brazilian Bishops. “A disposition to change and experiment and to question doctrine has been growing for 30 years now, and
Pentecostalism has been the biggest beneficiary because it is a more emotional religion.”

Of course! Brazilians in the past two decades have suddenly woken up from their slumber. Naturally, this makes them a more emotional lot (after all, Brazilians are naturally a passionate people; we've all seen Carnival!). And, of course, emotional people -- lacking rationality -- are magnetically attracted to charismatic movements. I mean just look at these people in what is either a Pentecostal or a charsimatic Catholic mass:

What I love about this picture is the look on the face of the younger woman on the right of the picture. Someone got dragged out o fbed on a Sunday to go to Church.

Some days the world just goes a bit crazy

Well folks, today I think that it is not only the reporting on the news which is insane, but the actual news today too. Let's take a swing around the world, shall we:

Taiwan MPs got into a fist-fight today over the timing of a bill to be voted on.


Yes, you see correctly: one MP's arm was bloodied following the legislative smack down. Honestly, I think the US should take their lead. Could you see Bush and Cheney coming to the Senate to brawl it out with Schumer and Kennedy? I think it would be a much better way of deciding the fate of the nation than whatever they are doing now, anyway.

Moving on.

North Korea, which seems to be at the center of a great many absurd new stories, is meeting with South Korea in an effort to finally implement the oft-delayed rail linking of the two States. So how to break the ice at a meeting between the two bitter rivals who have not had a rail link in 50 years? Tell a joke of course! Al Jazeera reports:

Shortly after the meeting began however, Lieutenant-General Kim Yong-chol opened proceedings by telling a joke at George Bush's expense.

"I recently read a piece of political humour on the internet called 'saving the president'," he was quoted as saying in pool reports from the talks.

Kim then went on to recount an often-told joke about the president out jogging when he a group of children save him from a sticky encounter with a speeding car.

(You can read the joke at the end of this page)

That's right! Offer the beginnings of the joke in the body of the article, but don't reveal the whole thing 'til they have read the whole article. But was the joke funny? Let's just put it this way: the article reports that "The South Koreans did their best to look amused":

Dude. Either the South Koreans really suck at looking amused, or that was one bad joke.

On to Little Britain, where the great people of Northern Ireland are celebrating a historic power-sharing agreement. Of course, for Tony Blair it is more like an ahistoric power sharing agreement. The BBC reports:

Mr Blair said that the day's events offered the chance for Northern Ireland to "escape the heavy chains of history" and "make history anew".

I'm not quite done formulating this thought, but there is something very interesting about the logic of history here. While I ramble, feel free to be amazed by the picture to the lefty According to this formulation, history, being a series of conflicts between political groupings, can do nothing but hold a nation back. But what is it being held back from? Surely it is not from violence, since Northern Ireland has been relatively peaceful for a decade now. Maybe it's just a report in The Economist of London that has me thinking it may be tied to the logic of capital. After all, capital by its very definition is not allowed to have a history. And the language of a nation being "chained down" and needing to restart are often associated with neoliberal structural reforms. Could this be an ideal of the neoliberal State slipping from Blair's lips? In that case, is the neoliberal state postmodern? Anyway, it's just some wild speculation. Like i said, the ideas aren't really quite formulated yet.

Finally, what crazy news wrap-up would be complete without a commentary on Israel? Israel today announced it will donate $5 million in aid to refugees in Chad and Dafur. Refugees closer to home will receive $5 million of bombs every day over the next few years. Oops.

Jealousy

<--While we are on the subject, I am very jealous of those giant timers they have in front of them. I want those in American debates as well!

So I didn't blog about the first round of the French election. Nobody won, and auite frankly I don't really care that much about French politics. But something about their election did strike me: they had 85% turnout. 85%! Eighty-Five percent! Hell, we are lucky if we get half of the electorate to turn out.

Now, the BBC is reporting that half of the electorate watched the latest Presidential debate. This is absurd. Not only do they have absurdly high turnout, but the majority of those voters are actually informed?

And the real kicker is that it seems the French aren't even that excited by the two candiates.

The Market Wins! The Maaaaaaaaarket Wins!

So I love reporting on teh financial sector. Between anthropomorphising it, infusing it with totemic spirits, and the metonymic devices it is a structuralist anthroplogist's dream. But for CNN, it appears to be a sports team:

NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- The Dow rallied to yet another
record high Wednesday, capping its longest winning stretch in nearly 52 years,
on robust earnings news, a $10.6 billion deal for Cablevision and a strong
reading from the manufacturing sector.

The Dow Jones industrial average (up 75.74 to 13,211.88, Charts) rose nearly 0.6 percent to close at an all-time high for the fifth time in the last six
sessions. The Dow also hit an intraday high of 13,256.33 during the
session.

The blue-chip indicator has now risen in 21 of the last 24
sessions - the best streak since the summer of 1955. Back then, the 30-share Dow
climbed about 10 percent over 25 sessions while it's up about 7.5 percent in the
recent run.

;">I just hope that the Dow Jones stays on its toes for the playoffs. The Nikei has a huge index and the EU Common market, while young, has been showing remarkable maturity and poise. They could put the breaks on that wining streak real fast unless the Dow Jones recruits some new stocks. Luckily, they have a great source of talent in their minor leagues: The S&P 500 crew has a few prospects just itching for the big time!

Huzzah!